Writing a Successful Query Letter, Plus the Query Letter that Got Me Four Offers

· by · in

So, I’ve been talking to a lot of people about querying lately and giving them advice on how to write a good query letter… because, let’s face it, query letters are SO important. They’re the first thing that an editor or agent will read, and a poorly written query letter suggests a poorly written manuscript–and quite often, editors and agents won’t even read the writing sample if the query letter has typos, is poorly organised, gives superfluous information and doesn’t include the basics. So, I thought I’d share with you all the query letter that got me four offers from editors on my novel, UNTAMED.

But, before I share that, I thought I’d talk a little about what a query letter is, and what it should include.

A query letter is an introduction to your work. It should be well-written, but concise. It needs to tell the editor/agent everything he or she will need to know about your book. Although many agents and editors have their own guidelines of what needs to be in the queries that are sent to them, they all usually want the query letter to tell them the following:

  • the genre of the manuscript
  • the word count of the manuscript
  • whether the manuscript is completed or not*
  • whether the manuscript has been previously published–and if it has, which rights you still have
  • the title of the manuscript
  • a brief description of the manuscript–and this description should be enticing
  • any relevant information about you, as the author, that ties in with the subject of the book
  • any previous publishing credentials

*If you’re querying a first draft, then stop! That manuscript won’t be ready, and by querying a first draft, you’re already limiting the number of agents/editors you can send the manuscript to when it is finished, as most won’t look at queries for a project they’ve already passed on.

Another thing to make clear: you shouldn’t hold out on giving the ending away to editors/agents in the synopsis that is often requested to be sent alongside the query letter.

So, without further delay, I’ll share with you the query letter that I used for my debut novel, UNTAMED. This query letter got me four offers from publishers, and was released by Prizm Books in May 2015. You can purchase UNTAMED here.

Dear [name]

‘Untamed’ is a completed 100,000 word manuscript aimed at the dystopian market, for a mature young adult readership.
The plot focuses on what happens when a form of chemical modification takes over the world, and the conflict it causes between the Enhanced people and the Untamed, those who refuse to adapt to the new survival methods, in their day-to-day struggle for survival. Aimed at the young adult market, the story is told from the perspective of a seventeen year-old female Untamed human, who is on the run with her family from the Enhanced population.
As one of the last original Untamed humans left in the world, Seven’s life has always been controlled by tight rules; stay away from the Enhanced, don’t question your leader, and, most importantly, never switch sides, because once you’re Enhanced, there’s no going back. Even if you are now the perfect human being.
But after a disastrous raid on the Enhanced Ones’ resources, Seven soon finds herself questioning the very beliefs that she was raised on. And, as one of the most powerful Seers that the Untamed have ever known, she quickly discovers that she alone holds the key to the survival for one race.
Yet, Seven must choose wisely whose side she joins, for the War of Humanity is on its way, and Death never takes kindly to traitors.
Incorporating elements of fantasy and science fiction into a dystopian society, this novel centres around the themes of inequality, justice, and the notion of doing ‘the right thing’.
‘Untamed’ is the first book in a series of four novels, the other three of which I have completed outlines and rough drafts for. I am very excited to share this with you, and have attached a synopsis and the first three chapters of ‘Untamed’ for you to read, as your guidelines requested.
I currently have had seventeen short stories accepted for publication, both online, in eBook format, and included in paperback anthologies, raising money for charity. 
I live on a farm in North Devon, United Kingdom, where I co-run a Shetland pony stud; other hobbies of mine include inline skating, blogging and art.
Thank you very much for your time.
Kind regards,

Madeline Dyer

 

 

[address and telephone number]

—

As you’ll see, from the text that I’ve put in a different colour, I made sure to only send the materials alongside the initial query that were requested, so this part changed for each individual query (although a synopsis and the first three chapters were the most commonly requested materials). And, if I wasn’t sending a synopsis, I also included a brief paragraph below the back cover copy-style description that summarised the main events of the book, along with the outcome.

Also, I choose to include a back cover copy-style description in my query letter, as I love writing these. But it isn’t the only way to describe a manuscript. (And that’s another thing–always talk about your ‘manuscript’ rather than your book–a book is already published, a manuscript isn’t).

And, by no means am I saying this is a perfect query letter. It isn’t–but it worked for me. There’s one thing about it that now jumps out of me, and that is where I talk about my published short stories… I should’ve mentioned who published the stories. And this is what I do in the queries that I send out for current manuscripts that I have on sub–and I mention that I got a book deal for my debut novel as well.

Other things to consider:

  • I recommend sending out batches of query letters in tens. That way, if you’re using a query letter that doesn’t work, then you haven’t already approached everyone on your list, but still have others you can try out your query on.
  • Get other people to look at your query letter before sending it out. Remember once you’ve sent it to one editor or agent, you can’t send an updated copy.
  • Make sure you proofread your query letter!
  • And always, always follow the publisher’s or agency’s guidelines.
  • It can also be a good idea to add a paragraph about your marketing strategies for such a manuscript should it be contracted, as a lot of the marketing efforts do fall to the author.

If you want to read more examples of query letters, then I suggest you have a look at this section of the Writer’s Digest website, where they have links to around 60 example query letters.

Do you have any other ideas or tips for a successful query letter? Let me know in the comments below!